Welcome back to the hottest Artemis Fowl-themed weekly celebration on the Internet!
Prologue
My hearts starts swelling up as we're told Artemis' favorite book is the bedtime story he's never read himself, but that only his father read to him. That's so sentimental and so Princess Bride I can't help but love it!
-and then the sentimentality is shattered by that old family adage and his father's obsession with it: Aurm est Potestas.
Chapter 1: Cold Vibes
Artemis' birthday is September 1st. Just FYI. In case you didn't know that already.
What, me? No, no, of course I totally knew that already. I just thought, maybe if you didn't know...
'Left Foot Fowl' is undoubtedly an apt nickname, but what truly fascinates me is that Artemis somehow endeavored to endure this school bully's taunt for a whole week before he's finally had enough and buys out the kid's inheritance as way of payback.
It also makes me wonder when exactly this occurred on Arty's graph of slow character growth. I find it unlikely Artemis returned to St. Bartleby's after losing three years in Hybras (little hard to explain that, I'd think) but the fact that Artemis restrained himself from any petty revenge for a whole week bespeaks at least post-Arctic Incident, if not later.
Artemis intro by way of this terse and sharp conversation with the restaurant owner is great because, at first, I'm thinking "Whoa, Arty's reverting big time" and then "2 hours + third-rate equals five?! What deep end did you fall into?!"
By page 12, I already love superstitious Arty trying to 'appease the number gods' vs that part of Artemis that is utterly horrified by the insanity. I am so looking forward to more crazy Arty vs horrified Arty. Which is a very good thing, because the two other times I've read this book, I don't think I found it this entertaining.
Nice tells, Foaly; want to come over for a poker night?
Whoa, whoa, wait a minute-
FOALY'S GOT KIDS?!?!
As in, plural? As in colts and fillies? As in, somewhere along the line and all this craziness Foaly became a full-fledged father and we're just finding out about this NOW!??!
I mean, it was harsh enough finding out we -I mean, Holly- missed his wedding, but now Foaly's the head of a whole family and we missed that somewhere in between, too?
THE PROJECT and THE PRODUCT are obvious extremes of 'The Plan', sans our favorite scheming vampire smile. Instead, I think THE PROJECT gets a too-wide smile and crazy eyes to go along with it.
An icebreaker joke about ice breaking and it melts on arrival. Ahh, only Artemis could do that.
Artemis' brain tripping on Atlantis Complex guilt is one frighteningly entertaining place to be. Constant fear of the 'number gods' feels a little like Lovecraft's Elder Gods, but with Colfer's obvious comedic flare. Poor Arty. But he's sure entertaining when he's crazy, isn't he?
Chapter 2: The Jade Princess and Crazy Bear
'The screeching melodramas'. I'm laughing not because Artemis accused Butler of being melodramatic; oh no, Artemis can't just say that. He accuses his bodygaurd of having 'a touch of the screeching melodramas'.
Which brings me to two points:
- How old was Artemis when he actually used the phrase 'screeching melodramas'?
- Why have I not been using this term for years?
Hey. HEY! Stop the presses! Artemis is actually exercising? And making good on all those vows to become more physically active? Who are you and what have you done with the real Artemis Fowl?
Interesting... Butler noticed a distinct mood swing in Artemis after the lemur incident in Morocco, which means Artemis' symptoms began directly after the events of The Time Paradox. So that ending bit last week, of Artemis staring at the stars and feeling insignificant and depressed, and realizing that the sweet taste of victory wouldn't be coming? It was foreshadowing, baby! The beginning of the madness. And I am so okay with how weird that made me feel, leaving Arty in that emotionally vulnerable place, because it was all for the sake of character growth.
Ha! I feel like the dad in Calving and Hobbes; no matter how bad a project or event, it's all worth it in the end because 'it builds character!'
Wait, so is Artemis' newfound exercise routine with Butler another sign of Atlantis Complex? Bear with me; I've been teasing Arty every time he gets into a situation that requires physical dexterity and he vows he's start working out but then never actually follows through. That is, in short, a broken promise and a vow he doesn't keep. Which is something to feel guilty over. And the Atlantis Complex is triggered by guilt and, while I'm not saying his failure to exercise is what caused Arty's mental condition, it's obvious that Artemis is in full, windmill-tilting, damage control mode. He's overcompensating for all his guilty deeds by trying to single-handedly save the world and it could now be argued he's overcompensating for his guilt over not actually exercising because he's not just working out on a home gym, oh no, he's having Butler -Butler- teach him the arts.
THE RETURN OF JULIET!!! I've only been waiting for this for four books, guys.
Chapter 3: Orion Rising
Amber sparks? So I glean from this that as fairy's age, their sparks fade from blue to amber. I'm noticing quite a few lovely little nuggets of worldbuilding that I haven't noticed in the past. But this too means that Holly is getting old(er) and maybe starting to feel all those adventures catching up with her. Guys, if she says any variation of 'I'm getting to old for this' I'm going to lose it.
With Artemis down for the count and suffering a number of psychosis and Foaly on the brink, Holly's about to be the only sane member of this triumvirate. Poor Holly.
Foaly.
In the field.
Covering Holly's back.
With a gun.
Mr. Consultant teaming up with the maverick Captain to save the world side by side, not from the safety of Haven? This just made my day.
Ooh, ooh, am I about to get the Arty/Foaly team up I've been waiting for?
To Holly, Orion's eyes 'seem softer somehow' and this presents an interesting thought:
Orion = soft, kind, generous, but no cunning
Artemis = mastermind, ruthless, selfish
Orion appears just in the moment they need Artemis' genius and cunning but I ask myself -is there ever a time Orion would have been a gladly received replacement for Arty in Holly's eyes? Would she ever have the time or patience for him? In other words, would Orion's good qualities ever be enough to outweigh Artemis' bad qualities and make the former more valuable to anyone?
Orion is essentially a manifestation of everything that Artemis is not; his 'good twin', with some qualities that perhaps Artemis feels guilty he doesn't possess, perhaps wishes he possessed. Artemis was left in a very emotional and vulnerable place at the end of The Time Paradox, fully realizing and holding himself responsible for all that went wrong. In my fangirl head I feel that, ultimately, we are about to see a physical manifestation of Artemis' struggle with that: Would I, my family, my friends, and the world be better off if I were less me and more like everything I'm not?
Now I'm excited to see how this all pans out. Ah, supposition my old friend.
April's reading schedule for The Atlantis Complex:
April 4: Chapters 1-3
April 11: Chapters 4-7
April 18: Chapters 8-Epilogue
April 25: A Special Surprise!
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